[Quit Whispering . . . I Can Read Your Mind, So Quit Cursing Me]


Before School

Well its offically Friday and I'm bugging about school right now. I have morning classes today. I asked Cari earlier when I hit the store. Sad, but I'm still in blame for skipping... which I so totally did not. Long story short guys, I'm going miz again and wanted to leave. So I did. I left and headed out to the Rez. We went down to the Rapids area which I was suppose to spend all damn weekend! BUT NO! What happens instead? I'm not even 5 min. past the state line and I hear Anni's little voice in my head telling me that ditching is not right. Anni's voice and then Shay's. LoL. They bug me all the way till the Rapids and all over the city. Poor me! Voices in my head. Well, after that, I sat around trying to will it to go away, and then I though, "What the hell am I doing?" As much as I do not like school, I live for Anni and Shay. So afterwards, I packed my bags up and come on home. Which was no fun at all. But anyways, I don't want to go to school! I know, I'm whiney and sound like a little girl, but I think that even 15 year olds are allowed a break to bitch and complain about something anyways.

Now I'm worrying about my life and so called "life" in the world of social and society. LoL. Yeah, but right now, I'm worried about finishing a really hot, and I mean HOT Twilight posting at the Edward/Bella grouping. Steamy. LoL. But damnit Carlisle, get out of the fucking picture! LoL. But thank God, he does! EDWARD/BELLA FOREVER! [Also supporting Jacob/Bella.] I'm in tears! ;_; Bella cheated on Edward! WITH CARLISLE! NOOOOooO!

The skies look grey, I hope it means rain, but with my current luck; I have to doubt so. But I've got to say that ever since I had that conversation with my *ahem* "friends," that my days are really going back to how they were; boring, dull, uneventful, tiredom... just plain dead. I'm feeling that immortal feeling in me again and also the pain is coming back. More emotionally rather than phsyically. And I'm starting to desire a... um... companion? Odd. I never craved companionship. I knew I would always be the odd one out, but I just grew used to it and now I think I'm turning sadist again. So I'm back where I started except this time not as dramatic and suidical. That part, I most definatly gotten rid of and I'm happy that I have. I didn't have to have help from anyone else. No. I did it all on my own and so right about now I'm thinking that I can do it all over again. But as they say, whatever floats your boat! ^_~ To float my boat I need rain... LOTS O LOTS O RAIN. RIGHT. NOW. DAMNIT. FIST. SHAKE.

I'm also feeling kinda lonely, so I'm thinking about reading once more my beloved tale; To Wash It All Away by Crystal Echoes. Or how about simply more Twilight/New Moon LOVE? Yeah, me too. How about some Royal Sun? Hell yeah!




After school:

Yeah, I went to school. It was so fucking cool. XD

I mean, I get there, and yeah band was boring for she was there. But as soon as I saw Anni, man! I swear! My lifetime just doubled over! LoL. So I went to go get my makeup slip with Anni who offered to come when we meet Shay outside of the stage doors. We went to go and get my makeup slip but we ran into him: the one that haunts me; DS. Yeah, I admit it, my heart flipped, but I remembered the pain of love, so I started to bask in the warmth of Anni's voice. THANK YOU ANNI!

But we got the slip and returned to class. Fuck yeah, it sucked. LoL. We played Like The Stars Forever and Ever before breaking the group to go and play the concert pieces and different groups. So our small, tiny 4 player piece [Anni, Courtney, Ashley, and I] leave to go and play before returning only to find Mr. Meng bitching and complaining about the band not practicing, save us actually practicing in the choir room. LoL. That was so fucking funny the way some of those losers looked. Hahah! I HAD to laugh!

I thought P.E. was going to be a bored, but it happens that I won the game of Capture the Flag! FUCKING YEAH SHIT! LOL! Johnathan and I were the only ones left to duke it out so I saved my life and saved Taylor's before running back to grab the last flag. It was so fucking awesome that I was so shocked I didn't know why everyone was laughing and thanking me. Anni had the BIGGEST grin on her face I ever seen! LOL!

I ran around in my slacks and hoodie after that to pretend to be drunk before I hit the Biology class. I copied Anni's notes before we continued to watch March of the Penguins and I cried for all those little penguins dying. :*( How sad! But I wandered the halls looking for the jackass who dared to steal Anni's hairclip and even got a few swigs of pop from the pop machines. Damnit, the caffiene one almost died. After that was calm; I rested in Art Class and took a nap. I was then picked up by my mother and we went to the place she works [she's the manager at some store in town] and I sat around talking to random people I happened to cross. We come home and I picked up Michaela and the others before hitting the Rez again. This time; my grandmother's house which reminds me so much of Billy in Twilight. LoL. And since my vacation (see above - I was suppose to be gone today having went to a shitty day of school on Thursday) was postponed due to Anni's voice, I slept rather good over there on the couch for quite some hours before we returned home to watch T.V. and eat the best food in the world; poptarts. LoL. But that was my day. Which I so fucking enjoyed and wished that everyday was like this one, which is sad for it cannot be.

To others; I know this is not much compared to others, but I'm only 15 leading on and this is as good as it's going to get for me. I'm loving every damn minute of it. But I know, at least I care to know it, my salvation is still lost.

Now I have to go read a LJ comment from someone who I know will hurt me (*ahem* Kisses!) . I shall report tomorrow with a blunder. I'm going to go cry some more with my broken heart.

March 17: Yeah. SatansKisses99 (or demonic_kisses) is quite mad at me. Psh! Sheesh! What more can I give you?!